Rain

"If someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time."- Maya Angelou

What do you think about that quote? It sounds good right? Living a life that allows you to write off or accept a person merely off of a single success or fail rate. This is my question, if someone is exactly what you want them to be toward the beginning of a relationship and then later on uncovers a side of themselves that you didn't sign up for, what then? You chose to believe them the first time and now you are in the middle of the ocean deciding whether to stay on board or jump ship. What is the right move?

You see, I've used that ideology for a greater part of my life to a fault. If I don't like what I see at first, I have no obligation to continue any further, but if I choose to believe yes at the beginning of a friendship, and things change to where I am no longer happy with the reality I am living, then I use the same mindset, "Well I guess this is who they really are, and now I'm stuck for good, because I believed them" thus my ideology is invoked and I choose no right to happiness because I signed up for what I saw at the beginning. And because I took face value, I'm just going to be miserable unless I get what I agreed to at the start. I voluntarily put chains of loyalty on myself.

I wonder what would happen if we completely changed our mindset? Not to say that we shouldn't live loyally, but that our intent and goal shouldn't be to be in relationship based off of what is pretty and shiny at first and to discard that which doesn't appeal or benefit to us later.

I firmly believe that in relationship, and life in general, we should walk with the amount of grace that Jesus displayed on the cross, even if it isn't what we "saw" in the beginning. Let me explain, I may not find it comfortable to love someone that no longer fits where I placed them to fit in my life. But I don't have an option. I may not want to show grace to someone whom I deem as being less than what I agreed to, but it's not a choice. How many times have I done stupid, irresponsible things? How many times does the Lord forgive me? Not just 70 x 7 but probably closer to a number that won't fit on this screen. Although my heart was pure and on fire for God when I got saved, I have had several moments since, where I can say I wasn't walking in that same zeal. But His grace and forgiveness gives me new life, because His mercies are new every morning. When did I become so indignant that my happiness and contentment is worth more than staying true to a life of grace that I've received and live by, a grace freely given to us all? I have to, no, get to show grace, to forgive, and to restore, if that person asks for it, and here's the kicker, to forgive and show grace even if they don't. We are not obligated to stay in the middle of a harmful situation, whether physically or mentally but we are obligated to forgive.

"For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you."- Matthew 6:14

So maybe, my ideology is right, but my mentality is wrong. Instead of looking at a shifted friendship as a prison cell, I should look at it like a vacant lot. To build and dream on. With every word we speak, and thought we think about a person, we lay a foundation that is built upon, whether solid, or unstable. I want my heart to be so right that I can love someone into change, that with my words and thoughts I am helping them build a firm, pure foundation for the Lord to build upon. I want to be willing to walk out the course laid in front of me, whether it is to restore a friendship, or a person altogether. I will choose to live, think, and breathe forgiveness and grace.

So what do we think then? Do we believe we are what people see at face value, or believe that God's grace and forgiveness gives us the opportunity to be more than face value, to be His value. My prayer is that I and you reading this will walk with eyes of reality, that with every glance we give a stranger, with every word we speak to a close friend, we see God's work in progress and that we choose to be a part by giving what we all need to grow and to fulfill heavenly destiny, forgiveness and grace.

I see forgiveness like rain, cleansing, refreshing, and a life source to everything.

Living Plan A,

Cavanaugh

Tapestries

"There is only Plan A, there is no such thing as Plan B."

That one statement has stuck with me now for a long time. I'll never forget when a close friend uttered those words to me during a very discouraging time in my life.

I wonder, how many times a day we question a possible second outcome? I know I do it. From a meal at lunch to a comment made to a friend, I am always reliving and reprocessing a situation to make sure there was no possible way I could have made the "wrong" choice. How exhausting is that? As if my irrational thinking a couple of hours after a situation has any power to actually change the outcome.

There is a very strong scent of insecurity among this generation, and yes I know I'm a part of that. Sometimes I lay awake at night, my mind racing with attacking thoughts about a conversation or a choice that, in my mind, has completely blocked my chance of "success" whether it be relational or career based.

Where has all of this come from? Since when have I forgotten who I was created to be? And how can I be so easily convinced of defeat? I fully accept the fact that I allowed this. By even entertaining the idea that I could somehow destroy God's ultimate plan for me, I am walking in extreme arrogance. Like God is in Heaven saying, "Ahhh, I wish he wouldn't have said that, I don't know how I am going to get her to marry him now! Oh what to do, what to do"or "Oh I can't believe he hit that note, how am I going to get him hired again?" Now you see, that sounds stupid to you now, but how many times do we question what we do? I am not advocating a life of reckless behavior and choices. But I am advocation walking in a peace knowing that you haven't messed it up. There is a master plan that you are fitting into, along with all of your quirks and wrong steps.

This is what I know to be true. The Lord has never let me ruin anything, because I can't ruin a perfect plan. I may make mistakes, and cause myself frustration due to carelessness but it all fits in my life like some kind of elaborate tapestry or 1,000 piece puzzle. I hope that in reading this you can gain some solace knowing that you haven't messed it up. You haven't missed the boat. Your time hasn't passed. Wait patiently upon the Lord and continue your journey, enjoying every bump, hill, and scenic route along the way.

Living Plan A,

Cavanaugh